It's cool this morning. The clouds hover and rain hangs in the air not quite ready to fall to the earth's feet. This morning a damp breeze blows through my window mingling with the steam rising from my coffee cup. Earlier as I lay in bed, under an open window, the hooting of our neighborhood owl beckoned me to linger in a dreamy state. As I snuggled deeper listening to the whoot, whoot, whooting, my spirit rested and my mind tried to absorb the wisdom he shared for it sounded as if he might be sharing some secret just as the sun was rising - not that I have seen it yet. But that is alright. I love rainy days. Time just moves slower and it somehow is more acceptable to stop and sit awhile, enjoy the rain drops as they splatter fat on the sidewalk, read a book, have a cup of tea. And never make an excuse for it. Slowly, gently, I will move through this day and linger if I choose over scripture, in prayer, with tea and just rest in the quiet God has given me today, for this is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it.
And be grateful. I have been so busy for the last six weeks that I have neglected my blog, my writing, and most importantly, my quiet time with God. I have missed it all. It started out as just being busy one day and snowballed into a six week drought. I wasn't being lazy and I was doing "good"things. Productive things. Selfless things. At our women's retreat last weekend, our speaker, Lynn Cowell of Proverbs 31 Ministries talked on Sunday morning about spinning out of control and that is the way I have felt for the last few weeks. Just completely and totally out of control. Then last Monday I stopped. I crashed and spent the week nursing a nasty cold and sheer exhaustion. By Friday afternoon, I was feeling overwhelmed at all I had to do so I spent the weekend doing nothing at all. Last night as I tried to drift off to sleep, I felt the anxiety building as I began to construct a to-do list in my mind. It was a restless night.
Then I awoke this morning to an owl hooting wisdom through a spring rain.
"Slow down," He said. "Be still. Just breathe."
A little whisper from God. On a day when it would have been so very easy to slowly begin to spin. Out of control. Right into disobedience. I want to live in God's will for my life and not just a string of random "good" deeds. When I meet Him face to face, I want Him to say, "well done good and faithful and obedient servant." I want Him to be proud that for once, while I was here on earth where He planted me in a perfect time and place for His will to be completed, that in the end I got it right because I stopped and said no to distraction and listened saying yes to His instruction. Today I have learned that "no" is not a four letter word. I have learned that it is not a selfish word, but a self-preservation one. And now I understand, that to be obedient to God, sometimes I will have to say no to others in order to say yes to Him.
