An Unfading Memory

And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: “Thisis now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. ~ Genesis 2:21-25 (nkjv)


This weekend I found God in my husband.

I was not exactly looking for God in this particular place, but here is how is came about.  After 18 years of employment with the same company, my husband took a new job.  Unfortunately, the former company held him to his thirty days notice and it was well past the date the new company wanted him to begin.  Translation: there was no time to take a week long vacation between jobs - which had been our plan. Randy was a little bummed out about this and in an attempt to be a good and perfect wife, I booked us a weekend get away in Charlottesville at the Boars Head Inn.  This was a mere two hour drive from Northern Virginia.  I picked a room with a porch and a lake view.  Randy managed to leave the office on his last day at 2:30 instead of 5pm. And wouldn't you know it, God being the Good Guy He is, did the rest.

Friday night after we arrived and settled in, we went downstairs to the Bistro on the deck - (unknown to us we needed fancier clothes for the dining room...oops!).  We sat and listened to the wedding reception guests on the terrace below and had a good laugh at our dinner.  I had ordered a starter in order to get a smaller portion and Randy ordered an entree because, well, he was hungry. When the food was served, I just started to laugh.  The "starter" was enough for 5 people and the "entree" was enough for 1/2 a person!  But this was the second joke, not the first.  When we opened the door to the deck, there was one other couple seated.  There were probably about eight or nine tables.  Now remember - and for those who don't know - we were one mile from UVA so imagine our surprise when the girl looks over at us as we pass and says to Randy, "University of Georgia?" with her eyebrows raised and thin pursed lips.  I glanced back and smiled ready to show our Dawg pride.  Randy was wearing a UGA shirt, of course.  "yeah," he replies nodding his head and with a 'go dawgs' ready on his lips, she interrupted saying as she pointed to her beau, "Georgia Tech."  A stinging smile and then, "we claim this area," drawing a box in the air with her finger for emphasis.  I quickly turned around and headed to the table we had already chosen.  I did this in defense, hers or mine I am still debating, because I wasn't sure whether to laugh or bite her. Where is Uga when you need him? I thanked God for laughter and His sense of humor.   

After escaping dinner with a lot of laughing and zero stinging, we retired to our covered porch.  God had so graciously secured us a room at the very end of our building which was ever so private.   I had packed a couple of bottles of wine for late night porch drinking and a small votive candle.  The tree branches swayed in the breeze. We sat talking in the candlelight, drinking our wine, and looking out upon the lake under a clear and bright moon.  I relished the quiet peace we found sitting on our dark rented porch.  The geese conversed as they floated in the lake, the frogs croaked and the cicadas sang a chorus as we watched twinkling stars appear.  I thanked God for a perfect porch and twinkling stars.

On Saturday, we were lazy.  We slept in, ate lunch, attended a wine tasting at Jefferson Vineyards.  We didn't know what we were doing at the wine tasting,  but it was fun and there was not one wine snob to be found. Once we returned to the inn, things took a turn and I had a good pout about it.  Randy wanted to go swimming and I did not.  Well, that is not exactly true.  I did want to go swimming, I just did not want to have to wear a bathing suit in front of other people to do it.  Randy refused to go without me.  So I huffed a little about why did he feel the need to pressure me to do something I did not want to do and I pleaded that he didn't understand what it was like to have people stare at a scar you couldn't hide.  See, I was in a car accident a few years ago and it left me with some scars here and there, but the one on my right thigh bugs me when I wear a swimsuit.  I can not hide it.  It really doesn't come from being vain because I do not believe that people are just waiting around for me to arrive so they can stare.  But the reality is, I can not avoid everyone's line of sight or their curiosity.  It can make me feel very uncomfortable and embarrassed.  So with a  "fine then" I grabbed my suit and changed and followed him to the pool.  I positioned myself on a lounge chair and watched him swim for a few minutes.  I wanted to just relax and read the book I brought, but I longed to just dive into that pool with the bright summer sun shining down on me.  But I held my position as if I were Custer at his last stand.  Randy would get out and come over dripping wet asking me to join him, but I would refuse.  Finally, he got out and came over and sat down beside me.  " You don't have anything to be embarrassed about.  I want you to come and get in the pool with me."  Then the magic words, "I think you are beautiful."  Well, that did.  What wife can refuse a husband's request when he says she is beautiful?  I certainly wasn't going to be the first.  And oh my goodness did that pool water feel good.  We swam for more than an hour and when the time came to go and get ready for dinner, I was like a little kid that really didn't want to leave.  I thanked God for my husband's persistence.  

After dinner, we retired again to the porch with a bottle of wine and our little candle and listened to the brewing thunderstorm.  He burned a business card from the old company in a final goodbye and said hello to all things in his new adventure.  When the rain began to fall, I thanked God for it because He knows I love to hear a good thunderstorm and the falling rain splatting on the ground.  I thanked God for the rain and for new adventures.

Sunday morning brought us gifts of a massage and a wonderful brunch.  We took our time getting home stopping at road side stands for blackberries and blueberries and baby yellow crook neck squash.  I read Dear Abbey out loud in an animated voice while he drove home and we laughed and laughed and wished the weekend would never end.  I thanked God for a perfect Sunday afternoon drive with my husband.

Sunday night as we fell into bed, I reflected on the weekend and how many gifts God had chosen to give to us.  All the little things that I never thought to ask for, God provided to make our weekend perfect.  I would like to say that I will remember every moment, every detail and the reality is some will blend into the tapestry of collected memories, but He gave me one gift that will never fade.  I saw God reflected in my husband and his actions Saturday afternoon while we were at the pool.  My husband encouraged me to do something that I did not necessarily have the courage to do on my own.  Isn't that what God does for us?  "Trust Me.  It's all good.  The blessing is right here on the other side. Just follow me"  My husband's love for me mimicked the unconditional love of Jesus and the perfect and perpetual love of God.  God has given me a perfect gift in my husband - a man who sees me and not a scar, who knows there is so much more to me than an imperfection.  That is a good gift.  A perfect gift.  A priceless gift. I thanked God for knowing my needs before I could speak them and for a husband who loves me just as I am - scars, pouts and all.

I have told you these things, not because I believe you really give two hoots about my weekend getaway with my husband, but because it shows how easily God can make Himself visible to us.  He loves to give us gifts.  He loves to bless our marriages.  He loves to show us how us how much He really loves us.  It proves that if we will just open our eyes to look around, focus our minds on Him and soften our hearts to accept His good and gracious gifts, that we will see Him everywhere, everyday.  May you see Him today in all His glory.

Control Issues and Grace

Then the Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to tend and keep it. ~ Genesis 2:15 (njkv)


I am having a little trouble showing grace the past few days.  It seems that my neighbor does not enjoy my style of gardening.  


My neighbor's yard is very neatly manicured and edged and weeded with chemicals.  His grass is very, very green.  There are many shrubs, few flowers.  It is what my friend and I call landscaped - it is the bare minimum for a neatness factor.  We also think, in some cases, it is a facade for control issues.



My yard is full of gardens.  They line my driveway, my portion of the sidewalk, and my fences.  I have herb gardens, vegetable gardens, flower gardens.  Some gardens are mixtures of mints and sages, some heirloom variety cosmos, coreopsis and bachelor buttons.  My crab grass has been weeded out by the clover that took it over in one corner of my yard which the honey bees love.  It naturally controls nuisance weeds and adds nitrates back to the soil.  I have what some might refer to as cottage style gardens.  I might choose the term free-spirited - The wispier, the better.  My grass is a little higher than my neighbor's - it is not knee high, but gracefully covers my bare feet when I walk in it.  Unfortunately, this adds to his stress level because where our yards meet, to his eye, mine seems unkempt.  So he cuts it.  Whenever he feels like it.  What he does not do is cut the whole lawn making my yard look half taken care of and to my eye, unkempt.


I know this may seem a petty issue and not worthy of a blog writing.  It is a difference of opinion and style and really, when all is said and done, is just a preference.  Those things I can handle and respect.  


The snide comments to other neighbors and to me, not so much. 


The comments are harder to handle than all the weeds that creep into my yard.  The more his control issues, lawnmower and Round-up spill over into my yard, the harder I find it to show any grace.  My teeth keep finding their way into the end of my tongue and I am sure that I am only one more comment away from completely losing it and my sanity, but thank you Lord for your Grace, which is sufficient for all situations.  I just, very simply, feel as though I have used the last bits in my little grace barrel.  Right now it feels empty and I feel hurt.  I try to not take this personally.  I am trying to show grace.  I would love to sit down and explain to him how much joy my gardens bring me and how the words that he has spoken to me and others have taken some of that joy away.  I know they are just words and I should just let them float away, but Embarrassment crept across my face blushing my cheeks when I knew the words had been spoken to a neighbor and friend.  Then, Spite reared up joining the party and began to spout off, "well, I will just show you.  I will plant a garden to border our front yards and then we will just see how you feel about that!"  The twins, Vengeance and Vindictiveness, walked up and reminded me with the power of an enticing threat, "His fence is not to code, remember?"

I went inside feeling low and angry and hurt.  I reasoned that it wasn't even my tongue that should be hurting, his was the one that had been wagging.  Mine had spoken in defense of my gardens.  Gardening organically was good for the earth, the honey bees and for me.  My yard is much like a bird sanctuary.  The yellow finches rest on the bachelor buttons and eat the seeds.  The bumble bees buzz around the milk weed while the monarchs lay their eggs.  My tomatoes and peppers and herbs can be eaten without ingesting chemicals and the rain water that flows deep into the cracks and crevices of the soil is clean and pure.  God has given me a little corner of His earth for me to care for and I believe that God and I are on the same page here.  It says in Genesis that He gave man dominion over the earth.  He expects us to care for it, nurture it and weed it, but I believe that first we have to begin in our hearts and our minds.  So I had to get to work and it seemed I had much work to do.


First, I plucked Embarrassment. Why should it be allowed to grow and choke out Joy and Happiness?  Why should I have to defend the beauty God creates in my yard or the nature that He gives to take refuge there?  The prickly Spite was the next to go.  She is a true troublemaker and sucks up all the nutrients that Grace needs to grow.  Vengeance and Vindictiveness are two things God did not plant in my garden.  The devil certainly wasted no time planting those seeds and they wasted no time growing, and before I knew what was happening, they almost completely destroyed Forgiveness who was struggling to survive in the darkness they had created.  I had to grab the pick ax for them both because those roots grow fast and they grow deep and they get their nourishment from the fires of hell.  As I weeded, it appeared I had some control issues of my own.  How had the weeds in my little Christian Garden gotten so out of control so fast?  My friend reminded me yesterday that sometimes the weeds just get ahead of us.  Yes, indeed, they do.

I believe that we can have a variety of gardens to suit different tastes.  My gardens grow with total abandon and never look back.  I can only hope that one day my Christian attitude will do the same.  I hope that I will always choose to freely take a fresh cutting of Grace that God so freely gives me fresh seeds each day for planting and that they will always find nourishment for growth. I can pray that I choose to take a cutting of Forgiveness, so that I might always forgive as quickly as God forgives me, whenever I am hurt.  I can only hope that one day my own angry tongue will be stopped in awe of Self-control's beauty and that I remember to nurture it until it is the most exquisite flower in my garden.  May my neighbor begin to see the beauty in my words and deeds that Grace replenishes so that he can always see God's beauty in my little corner of His world.

a message to my faithful readers

Someone had asked me - and I am sorry because at the moment I do not remember who it was - if there was a log of the daily Bible verses.  No there is not and being technically challenged like I am, if there were a way to create one, I fear there would be no way for me to understand it...lol.  I have gone back and added the daily verse to the beginning of the corresponding blog entries and hopefully, I have them all correct.  I thought I had marked them in my Bible or maybe made some notes somewhere - some yes and some no.  I will add the old ones as I remember or find them.  If anyone knows which ones are missing and wants to post it in the comment section of the blog entry, that would be great and I will add it to the post.


On a second note, I have also been asked which days I will consistently be writing - Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday right now because they are the least busy days and I think I will be have the most success at keeping up the schedule.


Last - I have added an e-mail-this-blog icon (envelope) that shows up next to the post-a-comment icon.  This will enable the blog to be e-mailed to anyone you would want to share it with.


Thank you all for reading and commenting.  It means the world to me and your words encourage me more than you can ever know.


Elizabeth


And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. ~ Hebrews 10:24-25

A Garden of Prayer

Prayer is like a garden.  Tend it and it will be fruitful. 

~ Elf Help Book, Prayer Therapy by Keith McClellan

And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, “Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!” So God granted him what he requested. ~ I Chronicles 4:10 nkjv


My prayer life is inconsistent.  I wish it weren't and deep down I know that I am the only one who can change it.  I know it takes discipline to make time for God everyday.  It is not that I do not want to, I just find it incredibly difficult to drown out the daily noise.  I wish I could blame it on some disorder - not that I want one because I have my share of issues - I just want an explanation.  I need an answer so I can solve the problem.  


Now the Nike commercial is running through my head...Just Do It!  If I could have my own motto every time I get distracted - Just Pray!  I envy the Prayer Warriors who can drop everything, drown out the noise and just pray without distraction.  I know at some point they must have had to develop the discipline to listen to God.  I know it is also a gift bestowed to them by God.  I know it is not my gift.  I am okay with this.  God has given me other gifts.


If only I tended my praying time like I tend my garden, it would be fruitful.  There are things I know about prayer.  I know the prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with (James 5:17).  I know that if I cry to the Lord with my voice, He will hear me from His Holy Hill (Psalm 3:4).  I know to be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication to let my requests be made known to God and that His peace which surpasses all understanding will guard my heart and mind through Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7). I know that the prayer of faith can heal the sick (James 5:15).  I know I am to pray without ceasing (I Thessalonians 5:17) and that the Spirit will help me in my weakness even though I do not know what to pray, that He will intercede with groans that words can not express (Romans 8:26).


If only my mind wasn't tempted to wander.  If only my body didn't follow.  If only it wasn't distracted by a to do list the moment I awaken.  


If only I prayed to God to help me with my prayer life.  But can I be honest?  I am afraid of what trial might be laid at my feet to get me on my knees and focused in prayer.  I think I am more afraid though of what I might be missing by not asking.  I look at the Prayer of Jabez.  He simply asked to be blessed.  And look what happened to him.  I think sometimes I am asking in prayer for the wrong things.  Maybe I just need to ask God to bless me, bless my writing, bless the words of my blog to reach out into cyberspace and that maybe they will bless someone else because He wants it to.  But there is a voice that rises up and says, "What if that is not what God wants?" and my faith cowers like a scared child in the midnight darkness.


Today my faith is small, smaller than a mustard seed it feels, and my mind is already beginning to wander....

God's Good and Perfect Gifts

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of Lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning. ~ James 1:17 njkv


This weekend I was in a mood.  

You know exactly what I mean when I say this because we have all been there at some point.  It is what I refer to as a funk because I could not shake it no matter how much I prayed, no matter what I did.  I whined a lot.  I cried a lot. And to my husband's horror, he heard most of it.  Maybe more than most of it.  I spent three days in the garden which should have been just planting flowers, but there was so much work to be done.  How do weeds grow so fast?  I think this was my major whine to God...How can something that as I see it have no purpose grow so fast and choke out all the good and beautiful things my garden has to offer?  I saw a sign the other day, it read "Garden of Weedin'."  I should have bought it. The weeding took two and a half days and the flower planting took thirty minutes.  In my opinion, this is not a fair balance and I sure let God (and my husband) know about it...for two and a half days.

At the end of it all, I had to check myself because I have nothing really ever to whine over.  So I want to share with you, all the places I found God this three-day weekend and I want you to reflect the rest of the day where you found God.  It may take some looking depending on your weekend, but I can promise you He was there whether you realized it or not.  So here is the partial list...

My husband, after working all day, came home Friday night and helped me dig a little corner garden in the front yard so that I could plant my lavender.  I found a red lavender that I had no idea existed in this world.  I thought it was all, well, lavender.

Saturday morning, the cloud cover lessened the heat index while I worked all day.

The bumble bees buzzed around my African Blue Basil before it was even planted in the ground.  They were happy and that made me happy.

As I yanked weeds in the front garden, little white butterflies fluttered around the Walker's Low Cat Mint as the sweet aroma of the mint filled the garden.

The honey bees have returned to my yard once again this year feasting on the clover that is overtaking the grass.  If it is successful, then I will never have to mow it again.  It might happen as soon as next year.

The geraniums smelled sweet.

All the spiders ran in the opposite direction from where I was standing, sitting or kneeling.

I did not see one snake.

Praying for spider and snake protection really works.

The sprig of apple mint my mom gave me last year, that I was sure would not make it through the winter of unprecedented snow fall, has grown into a huge clump and smells really good when my garden window is open in the kitchen.

All my Stella D'Oro Day lilies are blooming.

My Rosemary survived the winter and I can't wait to grill up some chicken and use it.  Soon.

A beautiful blue and black butterfly landed on a bush in my backyard and it stayed put long enough for me to grab my camera and take pictures.  It even opened it wings and rested.

I found every possible variety of heirloom tomato plant that exists and they are all planted in what used to be the Garden of Weedin'.

The shed that was torn down two weeks ago has given me a perfect spot for a fountain and pond (and I won't even have to do one bit of digging) so that I have a water source for my honey bees.

Next year for Mother's Day, I am getting my very own bee hive.

Last night when my husband was rubbing lotion into my sunburned back while I winced, he told me I looked sexy.

Reverse Cloud watching.  Really?  I know, right.  But just as I was drifting off to sleep, I looked out my bedroom window and realized something that never before had I noticed - reverse cloud watching.  The clouds were moving in and they were those wispy ones that swirl round and about.  These particular clouds outlined a perfect octopus.  It looked as if it were swimming gracefully through the water.  I could even see two stars that looked like eyes.  There were even some circular clouds along the tentacles that looked like the suckers.  It seemed so fluid and beautiful there in the heavens above me.  

And then, like any really good cloud watching moment, it moved on and changed its shape.  And so did my mood.  It did give me pause to appreciate that everything that comes from God is good and perfect.  Even when we fail to recognize it, appreciate it or whine through it.  It reminded me that God is always there and He is willing to give me gifts even when I do not deserve them or ask for them.  He is always there, ready and waiting, with a little surprise like Reverse Cloud Watching.  

Just because He can.  

Just because He is good even when I am not.